What word would you use to describe your current financial situation? Forced to guess, I'd say many of the people I know - including most of my family - would say comfortable. But even if my guess is way off the mark, I'm confident saying this: The stories people tell about how they've attained a state of financial comfort frequently include some predictable variables. Which of those variables come first when you tell your story?
Hard work? Who have you ever known who thinks their hard work had little or nothing to do with what they've attained? Smart choices? How many comfortable people have you met who will willingly own up to dumb choices - financial or otherwise - that set them back? So, how much of your story centers on your hard work and your smart choices? Whenever I'm telling my story reflexively vs. mindfully, those are definitely my go-to riffs.
How about luck and its close relative good timing? How much air time do those two get in your story? And what about privilege? Ever run across someone who was born on third base and thought they hit a triple? I have. Though I wasn't born on third base, my privilege has clearly played a part delivering me to my current level of financial comfort. Luck and good timing have also helped me. To deny any of those three have had a role is to tell only part of the story.
Here's a challenge: Listen carefully when you next hear someone speak of their road to comfort. Pay close attention to the story they tell. Then come back and tell me what has become clearer for you.
I'm grateful every day for the good fortune, good health, and privilege that allow me to live a comfortable life today. Yes, I worked hard but without all of those things, plus the luck of the draw that gave me a supportive and stable intact family and the good fortune to be born a citizen of the United States, my life would be very different. I'll never allow myself to forget that and the many other blessings in my life.
ReplyDeleteKim; Thanks for the thoughtful comment. Gratitude is an important element that helps all of us maintain perspective as we consider our road to comfort.
DeleteI can't speak for listening to someone else's story other than yours and Kim's in this blog. All of the above apply to me and they all get "air time." My husband and I am grateful almost every day for our good fortune to be living in a beautiful house, engaged in a vibrant community, beautiful family and ability to enjoy the pleasures of life such as travel, entertaining and giving back.
ReplyDeleteInes; Thanks for the comment. As I said above, gratitude is a key element.
DeleteHello, Pat,
ReplyDeletePlease add me to this list - of being very grateful for what we have, how we are able to live, be able to provide for ourselves and family, and be comfortable - a word that sometimes gets a bad rap, but it's fine with us. It's taken quite a few years to get where we are now but the hard work, the sacrifices made, the choices made all got us to this point in our lives. So, although there have been some bad, and some very dumb, choices made, and after listening to other people tell their stories, I wouldn't change anything as they would then impact where we are now and possibly, probably, change what we've come to know and love.
Be well,
Bob
Bob; Thanks (trifecta) for this comment. What role do you suppose luck, timing, and privilege had on your current level of comfort?
DeletePat - I'd have to say that luck and timing definitely played a part in my comfort level. those two things brought me to a job that I would never have given any thought to as a career and one where I would spend almost 34 years before retiring. And the added benefit of meeting my wife. Not so sure privilege played any part though - with exception of knowing someone who worked there and who had told me about the job opening that started it all. But I honestly have never considered this to be what I would call 'privilege'.
DeleteBob, revisited; A widely read and respected social architect named Peggy McIntosh has influenced my thinking about privilege; her work partially informs my post. If you see this AND if you are interested, I encourage you to read McIntosh's seminal essay on what she calls the "invisible backpack of privilege". Knowing you, I suspect your perspective on the role privilege has had on your success and comfort will, at minimum, undergo some scrutiny.
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