"I am here to live out loud.": Emile Zola
I've always considered my abundant energy a gift. But more than a few times in my life, people have told me that energy was wearing them out. I'm not always able to tell when my passion for something - and the energy feeding that passion - has overtaken me. Sound familiar to anyone? With people close to me, I can sometimes detect a tired look in their eyes telling me perhaps my passion-infused energy has crossed into attention-seeking territory. But picking up those signals from others remains an ongoing challenge. How about that? Familiar at all?
Where is that fuzzy line between living life out loud - as Emile Zola extols - and being too loud? As an extraverted man who has intense passions, that question is on the front of my radar regularly. We men have been enculturated to expect people to listen when we speak. And the extraverts among us are temperamentally inclined to use our share - or more - of airtime. Add in those intense passions and it's no mystery why the mansplainers of the world trigger me to the point of apoplexy. It's like looking at the worst image of myself.
Using my gift wisely is a life's work. Which gift of yours presents you with a similar dilemma?
"Never trust people who don't have something in their lives that they love beyond all reason": from Beartown (2016) by Fredrik Backman
Reflections From The Bell Curve: Living Life Aloud
What an insightful and self aware post this is. Your energy is a gift not just for you but for me. Because I stand on the dividing line between introvert than extrovert, it's a gift to have you take the lead in conversations, engage with others that I might have missed, create social interactions with intelligent, interesting people that I might never have reached out to. I benefit in countless ways, which makes the occasional overdrive of energy more than worth it.
ReplyDeleteSince you're the person most likely to get worn down by my unhinged energy, I appreciate you letting me off the hook by telling me how you benefit from it, at least sometimes. Despite your positive spin, I plan to continue trying to be aware of when my energy makes your eyes - or the eyes of others - begin to glaze over.
DeleteHey Pat. I tried imagining how some of your classes would be without the energy you bring, and I couldn't. You bringing that attention to each subject makes the class that much more enjoyable. When I'm talking about different classes that are offered as part of the BCC LifeLong Learning Series with some friends I've made there I have noted not only your knowledge in the specific course but that your enthusiasm makes each class that much better.
ReplyDeleteFor me, I'm not sure I have any gift like that. When I was still working I would be very involved in conducting training classes and I enjoyed that very much. And I was told that I was good at it. Difficult to be too enthusiastic about some of the different subjects, but I tried to make it as interesting as I could. I have my interests, my likes and loves and my passions. And I'm fine sitting back and watching those that have the gift.
Be well,
Bob
Bob; thanks for the comment and especially the kind words about my “enthusiasm” in my classes. My immodesty calling my energy a “gift” was unintentional and in this case I was trying to point out how any strength (or “gift”), when over-used, can be problematic.
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