Still, assuming I am - as I believe - much the same now as I've always been, I'm just as confident saying that the first impression I make on others has shifted radically over my seventy-six years. And in my case, that's been a good thing. How about this element of your make-up? Has the first impression you make on others changed a great deal over your lifetime? If your answer is no, I'm guessing you either don't care about the first impression you make on others or, you've been largely satisfied with how things have gone for you in that respect and have stayed the course.
But if like me you've decided - perhaps more than once - to change course in this respect, I'm curious to know what prompted your shift. Was it feedback someone close to you was good enough to offer? Was it adverse reactions from new people you met that persuaded you? Was it something you read or a conversation with others about this important skill? Was it watching others who struck you as being particularly inept - as I've often been - at making a good first impression?
Based on recent experiences, I'm considering iteration 6.0, first impression-wise, an average of a new one for each decade of my adult life. My latest tweak is not - as have been most of the changes that drove me to discard earlier iterations - being driven by an embarrassing incident or pleas from people close to me. I guess that's at least good news, right?
Interesting questions. I have been reflecting on something similar as I am writing stories and memories for my to-be-born great-granddaughter. A phrase from Nia comes up for me: same but different. It sounds contradictory but it isn't. Our bodies change, our attitudes and beliefs change and perhaps other things change, but I am still "Ines." Perhaps it is spirit, I don't know. I have finally left behind the need to make a good impression -whether it is first or not. I am interested in being authentic. And, I am cultivating talking less and listening more - a work in progress:).
ReplyDeleteInes; I'm pleased this post caught you at a time when similar reflections have been crossing your mind. I too strive for authenticity and congruence in my day-to-day interactions. The continual tweaking I've made to the first impression I make on others is more about being aware of the parts of "Pat" that have been arrogant or insensitive. And the tweaks I'm referencing here are largely connected to looking at earlier versions of myself when they appear in new folks I meet. In order to be congruent, I try to stay continually mindful of not returning to Pat 1.0-5.0; that's one of my "works-in-progress". The one you identified in your thoughtful comment is a worthy one; good luck with it. And thanks, as always, for reading and commenting.
DeleteHey Pat. I would like to think that I am the same person that I have always been. My beliefs are the same. What I enjoy is pretty much the same, although in somewhat different ways. As I approach 70 (Jan 2027) I find that the time I used to be getting ready to go out is now the time I am getting ready to go to bed. At least on must nights - lol. But I'm sure that is not so different from others my age - or around my age. And, not wanting to sound to down, there are obviously fewer tomorrows. But I remain positive, try to look at life and the world - even this insane one we're currently living through - with as much optimism as I can, and I try to enjoy each day as much as possible. Good family, good friends, good music. Involvement in what interests me. And, my never ending Peter Pan existence - " I may get older, but I refuse to grow up'.
ReplyDeleteBe well,
Bob
Bob; Thanks for the comment. My favorite part? Peter Pan's motto.
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