Soon after this exact thing happened recently while having dinner with new friends, I began reflecting on other predictive conversational topics. Asked to estimate, what percentage of the conversations in your life would you say have NOT involved either food, the weather, or family? Which topic would you say occupies the next highest spot after those big three? Work, perhaps? I suspect work could be up there, especially for those of you having a higher-than-average share of troublesome colleagues. I know during my full-time working years - particularly when I supervised people - talking about work happened more frequently than I wanted.
With my full-time work years behind me and Act Three well on its way, I'm confident in asserting that ailments have taken the place of work as a reliable - if tiresome - conversational standby. Still, there's no question in my mind that ailments of every stripe - what my wife calls OPS (i.e., Old People Shit) - continue to lag behind the big three. How about some of you from my Act Three cohort? How regularly do your conversations travel mindlessly down OPS Road? Have your complaints approached or surpassed the big three for conversational airtime?
Final questions. Which conversational topics would you welcome being more regularly introduced into your life? The topics you select don't necessarily have to supplant any or all of the big three - I'm guessing that scenario is highly unlikely - but wouldn't you welcome shifting that percentage around a bit? What prevents any of us from doing the introducing?
Work, weather, and food, aka the Holy Trinity, are small talk and metaphorically a type of food we all have to eat, but a food I despise eating, like a little kid pushing away their plate of broccoli! This isn’t exactly OPS for me but rather Young People Shit (aside from TikTok dances, yelling 6-7, etc.). It’s timeless and mandatory small talk. But at the same time, the big three/the big, bad dish are kinda needed as an icebreaker of sorts, a blank slate that can adorn any color of paint you want it to. Food? Oh, I just tried Detroit-style pizza for the first time—mind-blown! Work? I love writing, and sometimes our “jobs” don’t feel like jobs. The weather? The tides and clouds ebb and flow, set to the tune of nice jazz, like Kenny G or Chuck Mangione! Alas, I’m open to expanding the Big Three into the Core Four, or the Fabulous Five, etc. Apologies for the long, rambling screed!
ReplyDeleteDaniel; Thanks for the screed - great word. I agree that these topics (including the big three [food, weather, family] and work) are a sometimes necessary icebreaker. My musing here is aimed at getting readers to think about their conversations more and expand their conversational repertoire, if for no other reason than being mindful of the wide world of topics that are left unexplored when we rely on the big three and work to take up a disproportionate amount of airtime.
DeleteThanks again for inviting me to reflect. I will more consciously pay attention to the topics of conversation. Recently, I had a conversation with a friend at a crowded party and thanked her for having a "substantive" discussion. It happened organically but perhaps if I become more aware, it will happen consciously as well and perhaps more often!
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