Practicing Gratitude

Soon after my wife's involvement with the Positive Psychology movement reignited my commitment to regularly documenting moments of gratitude in my journal, our daughter made a suggestion to us that she believed could take our gratitude practice to another level. And she was right.

It began in January 2020 when we placed a ready supply of post-it notes in several colors and a pen next to a large glass jar on our kitchen counter. Whenever either of us is reminded of something we are grateful for, we record the date and the thought, fold and then put the post-it into our jar. When we have guests at our home and we remember, we ask them if they'd like to contribute something. We've even begun taking a small supply of post-its with us during time away from home and asked both fellow travelers and family to join us if they'd like.

I've saved the best for last. On or near the first of the year, my wife and I turn the jar upside down and shuffle all the post-its we've collected. We then read them to one another - out of order - giving us an opportunity to re-live moments of gratitude from the past year. This tradition - now repeated five years running - has quickly become one of the undisputed highlights of our year. Each year we are reminded anew of both the richness of our lives and the power of practicing gratitude. How do you remind yourself to be grateful?       

Stop - Start - Continue: 2025

Among the once-each-year series I've created, Stop - Start - Continue, published on New Year's Day, has continually gotten some of the most positive feedback. I encourage you to join me here today - as some of you have in the past - and make a public commitment. There is substantial research indicating people are much more likely to follow through on public commitments than on ones they make only to themselves. 

In 2025, I will stop allowing closeness communication bias to get in my way when listening to people in my family of origin as well as with my wife and daughter. When I finished reading Kate Murphy's exceptional 2019 book You're Not Listening, it was clear that I'd fallen into the trap of frequently "thinking" I knew what people close to me we're going to say before they'd finished speaking. I'm now firmly committed to curbing this behavior. 

Reflections From The Bell Curve: Rescuing Ourselves

In 2025, I will start reading at least one well-regarded biography each year. My reading diet has been lacking in this particular protein for too long. I'm thinking of starting with a biography of Winston Churchill, a complicated, controversial, and critically pivotal twentieth century statesman.  

In 2025, I will continue to regularly attend open jazz jam sessions all across the area. This road has started out bumpy and I've had some demoralizing moments. But I'm driven to find my improvisational voice and to discovering more joy in what I'm able to do vs. being pre-occupied with what still eludes me. 

I look forward to learning what you plan to stop, start, and continue in 2025. If you have trouble with one or two, no worries. Commit to just one of the three. But be sure to tell me and others what that is, OK?