Barring erratic Internet service, if more than three days have elapsed between my blog posts, it's safe to assume the nasty inner critic has gotten the better of me. At seventy-five years old, you'd think I'd done enough battling with this demon to ignore the incessant negativity. I wish.
It's only a few paragraphs. There is no money riding on it. There is always something of interest to reflect on that someone might find worthwhile. Besides, even if my reflection lands with a thud, aside from me, who will know? Put another way, what's the worst that can happen? What then - you might reasonably ask - can that nattering voice say to stop me from putting myself out there? What possible harm could come from recommending a good book or musing about a worthwhile or marginal movie? Why not riff on an arcane word, deconstruct an aphorism, share the essence of a conversation, muse about a recent or upcoming adventure? Those are some of the good questions I've asked myself these last few days. Here's what the nasty inner critic has screamed back:
IT'S ALREADY BEEN DONE!! IT'S BEEN DONE BETTER!! If you've rarely had to confront either of those statements when deciding to put yourself out there - in whatever form - congratulations. You've been more successful than me keeping the nasty inner critic in its place. Happens that this latest encounter with my nemesis wasn't stymied by those two screaming statements. This particular unwelcome visit stopped me cold by asking What is the point, Pat? That eternal and existential question is a surefire, if temporary, showstopper.
What strategies do you use to help silence the nasty inner critic?
Hi Pat, may I speak 1:1 to your inner critic please? HEY INNER CRITIC! STFU! Now that that's out of the way, I'd like to share a phrase that helps me at times when my I.C. acts up: "I am doing this for fun and for free." Be it a tutoring session with a disengaged student, a presentation that's a bit stumbling, or a political post that gets zero response, I remind myself that I'm doing the thing voluntarily with good intentions. I can't predict -- and especially can't expect -- a certain outcome. "For fun and for free" reminds me to check my ego, mentally downshift and give myself a tiny pat on the back FOR EVEN TRYING. Yes, a participation trophy of sorts. And maybe for some of us (read: you), adjust the bar so it is not so fecking high all the time! XOXOXOXOX
ReplyDelete"Anonymous"; Thanks for the comment and especially for screaming back at my IC. Now about that bar being set too fecking high, there's enough fodder there for a separate blog post or perhaps, a novella.
DeletePat,
ReplyDeleteHard to top what 'anonymous' has written above, but ... My inner critic is more fear driven than criticism. While I may have done a specific thing previously, I find, over the past few years, that a certain amount of fear has come about. Fear of failure, fear of not being as good as I expect, fear of forgetting. I find it interesting that I am fairly certain that has always been there. But, more recently, it has prevented me from actually 'doing'. Maybe I need to change my comment on your 'Stop, Start, Continue' post to include this ... Maybe ...
Be well,
Bob
Bob; Yeah, that fear bit also plays a big role in my ongoing battle with the NIC. All I can do is keep asking myself "What's the worst that can happen?" Doesn't work every time but it is a good tool to have handy.
Delete