Of the benefits I've derived joining several book clubs over the last few years, being around people with great vocabularies is near the top. Call me a geek, but people who easily use the word "deft" are just...deft.
It's no surprise people who like to read are good with words. And though I like the 50 cent variety as much as the next showoff, recently someone used the short gem "oeuvre" at a meeting. Hearing that said aloud, a word I'd seen in print many times but was always unsure how to pronounce (and never took the time to look up), was such a gift; now it's mine to use as well. How about "farcical"? Heard that at the same meeting as "omniscient"; two good words - different people. But, both were used with enough context that anyone who was paying attention could understand what was being said even if the word itself was unfamiliar. What a blast!
Growing up in a family that sometimes discussed words at dinner probably set me up to be a bit dorky in this regard. And I clearly remember my mother calling me an "instigator" long before I had any idea what the word meant. But it sounded so good. To this day, when hanging out with my sisters and brother, we still get lost in this stuff. My younger sister often singles out words used in my blog posts that she "loves" - her exact phrase. How can I resist loving someone like that? Between my book clubs and my siblings, I'm destined to remain a word nerd. Guess there are worse things, right?
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
My New Penpals
Instead of being cranky about how impersonal it can sometimes be, I've decided to begin thinking of e-mail communication as a modern day version of penpals. Remember those?
I never resisted e-mail. At the time of its inception, I was supervising eight people who sat in three different locations. It struck me then as a useful and practical way to communicate with a team. But I did fight the urge to use the tool communicating with just one person. I held onto a belief that face-to-face communication was preferable in those circumstances even as e-mail became ubiquitous over the ensuing years. By the time I stopped working full time in 2010, my view was a distinctly minority one as my inbox filled with notes sent to me alone even while my phone frequently sat silent all day.
Soon after stopping full time work, I discovered contact with my personal network was going to dry up if I didn't use e-mail as others did. But I started out cranky about it. Why didn't people just pick up the phone, darn it? It's possible starting this blog signalled a turning point for me. People who don't want to comment publicly have sent me moving e-mails about something a post awakened in them. As I began responding to those comments, I found myself increasingly using e-mail for non-blog related stuff, even when communicating with just one person. Then it dawned on me; it's like having penpals. Cool.
I never resisted e-mail. At the time of its inception, I was supervising eight people who sat in three different locations. It struck me then as a useful and practical way to communicate with a team. But I did fight the urge to use the tool communicating with just one person. I held onto a belief that face-to-face communication was preferable in those circumstances even as e-mail became ubiquitous over the ensuing years. By the time I stopped working full time in 2010, my view was a distinctly minority one as my inbox filled with notes sent to me alone even while my phone frequently sat silent all day.
Soon after stopping full time work, I discovered contact with my personal network was going to dry up if I didn't use e-mail as others did. But I started out cranky about it. Why didn't people just pick up the phone, darn it? It's possible starting this blog signalled a turning point for me. People who don't want to comment publicly have sent me moving e-mails about something a post awakened in them. As I began responding to those comments, I found myself increasingly using e-mail for non-blog related stuff, even when communicating with just one person. Then it dawned on me; it's like having penpals. Cool.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
A Guest Post
Are explanations needed? Ok, here goes.
It's an experiment. Author is family. What's the harm? Comments are welcome.
Oh, the words? "Must be nice!" I hate them. Are you jealous? Are you envious? What's the deal? I have something. I've accomplished something. You have not. That's too bad. Congratulate me soundly. Wish me well. But don't judge.
Want a shot? Forward your submission.
It's an experiment. Author is family. What's the harm? Comments are welcome.
Oh, the words? "Must be nice!" I hate them. Are you jealous? Are you envious? What's the deal? I have something. I've accomplished something. You have not. That's too bad. Congratulate me soundly. Wish me well. But don't judge.
Want a shot? Forward your submission.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Where Is HG Wells When I Need Him?
Where in your life are you most likely to succumb to the easy seduction nostalgia offers?
I don't listen to oldies and studiously avoid "classic rock". I largely prefer contemporary novels over the masterpieces from the literary canon; most of the movies offered on Turner network don't appeal to me nearly as much as today's films. Modern homes draw me in more than Victorians. I don't yearn for any "good old days", politically or culturally.
All those disclaimers aside, nostalgia does have appeal for me in at least one domain - I miss the days when making connections with people was easier for me. Although my undergraduate years come first to mind, I also recall finding friends more readily as a young adult. A quick perusal of my blog titles reveals several posts referring to this subject - not surprising. Though my first post made mention of a wish to connect with others via cyberspace that thought now strikes me as naive and a little sad.
Was it really easier "back then"? Not sure, but for this one instance a time machine might be handy to have.
I don't listen to oldies and studiously avoid "classic rock". I largely prefer contemporary novels over the masterpieces from the literary canon; most of the movies offered on Turner network don't appeal to me nearly as much as today's films. Modern homes draw me in more than Victorians. I don't yearn for any "good old days", politically or culturally.
All those disclaimers aside, nostalgia does have appeal for me in at least one domain - I miss the days when making connections with people was easier for me. Although my undergraduate years come first to mind, I also recall finding friends more readily as a young adult. A quick perusal of my blog titles reveals several posts referring to this subject - not surprising. Though my first post made mention of a wish to connect with others via cyberspace that thought now strikes me as naive and a little sad.
Was it really easier "back then"? Not sure, but for this one instance a time machine might be handy to have.
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Keeping Joe Happy, Just Because
Can you recall a moment in your life when a word you commonly use took on brand new significance?
About 15 years ago, I was a witness in a Grand Jury proceeding. When the district attorney asked me to recount a purse snatching I'd observed, everything was fine until I uttered the word "because". He abruptly interrupted me mid-sentence and said "Please return to telling me what you observed, Mr. Barton, not your guesses as to the reasons".
How often do we use the word "because" without realizing we have moved into the story-telling realm? I can honestly say that moment was a true awakening for me. I'd never before considered how the word because can be roughly equivalent to "Once upon a time...." Nothing wrong with fairy tales, provided we know we're making them up. But when trying to be accurate describing something, best to remember Sargent Joe Friday's advice - "Just the facts, ma'am; just the facts." Mixing because with facts? Joe would not be pleased.
About 15 years ago, I was a witness in a Grand Jury proceeding. When the district attorney asked me to recount a purse snatching I'd observed, everything was fine until I uttered the word "because". He abruptly interrupted me mid-sentence and said "Please return to telling me what you observed, Mr. Barton, not your guesses as to the reasons".
How often do we use the word "because" without realizing we have moved into the story-telling realm? I can honestly say that moment was a true awakening for me. I'd never before considered how the word because can be roughly equivalent to "Once upon a time...." Nothing wrong with fairy tales, provided we know we're making them up. But when trying to be accurate describing something, best to remember Sargent Joe Friday's advice - "Just the facts, ma'am; just the facts." Mixing because with facts? Joe would not be pleased.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Mr. Id Is Not Going Quietly
"Still waters run deep."
Many years ago, Mr. Id heard the cliche above used to describe someone he knew. After some recent reflection, Mr. Id is inclined to think still waters are sometimes more stagnant than deep, at least with some people.
As an extrovert, Mr. Id has been justifiably called obnoxious, opinionated, arrogant on more than one occasion. However, it doesn't strike him as axiomatic that introverts are necessarily "deep" based on how little they speak, anymore than extroverts are necessarily glib or superficial for all their banter. Isn't it conceivable that some introverts or taciturn individuals are people of few words because, in fact, they don't have much to say?
Shoot the messenger if you choose, but Mr. Id advocates rethinking the strong & silent/still waters/person of few words archetype.
Many years ago, Mr. Id heard the cliche above used to describe someone he knew. After some recent reflection, Mr. Id is inclined to think still waters are sometimes more stagnant than deep, at least with some people.
As an extrovert, Mr. Id has been justifiably called obnoxious, opinionated, arrogant on more than one occasion. However, it doesn't strike him as axiomatic that introverts are necessarily "deep" based on how little they speak, anymore than extroverts are necessarily glib or superficial for all their banter. Isn't it conceivable that some introverts or taciturn individuals are people of few words because, in fact, they don't have much to say?
Shoot the messenger if you choose, but Mr. Id advocates rethinking the strong & silent/still waters/person of few words archetype.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Challenging Myself
"Books are a social substitute; you read people who, at one level, you want to hang out with"
From Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself" (2010) by David Lipsky
That quote, from Lipsky's book about the time he spent with the late David Foster Wallace, kept playing in my head as I rammed through "Mortality", a 2012 posthumous release by Christopher Hitchens. Capturing my reaction to Hitchens' final musings in my book journal, I reflected on two other favorite essayists I can't hang out with anymore: John Updike and recently, Gore Vidal. Since Wallace's suicide in 2008, I've lost four friends I never met. At present, Jonathan Lethem is the top living essayist on my dance card.
And though I'm a bit intimidated by the intellect of all five of these guys, reading them is very good for me. Reminds me how energized I (usually) feel playing guitar next to someone more accomplished than I or losing at tennis for a parallel reason. If I can just keep that nasty ego at bay, I learn and grow. How about you? In what domains of your life do you work at challenging yourself?
From Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself" (2010) by David Lipsky
That quote, from Lipsky's book about the time he spent with the late David Foster Wallace, kept playing in my head as I rammed through "Mortality", a 2012 posthumous release by Christopher Hitchens. Capturing my reaction to Hitchens' final musings in my book journal, I reflected on two other favorite essayists I can't hang out with anymore: John Updike and recently, Gore Vidal. Since Wallace's suicide in 2008, I've lost four friends I never met. At present, Jonathan Lethem is the top living essayist on my dance card.
And though I'm a bit intimidated by the intellect of all five of these guys, reading them is very good for me. Reminds me how energized I (usually) feel playing guitar next to someone more accomplished than I or losing at tennis for a parallel reason. If I can just keep that nasty ego at bay, I learn and grow. How about you? In what domains of your life do you work at challenging yourself?
Monday, October 1, 2012
Work To Do
How often do we learn how to improve by recognizing some of our own bad habits or behaviors in others?
The place I'm most likely to learn this lesson is when I closely observe my men friends interacting with their wives or partners. Whenever one of them interrupt their wives, finish a sentence or story, or steal a punchline, I'm reminded how rude it is, i.e. how rude I can sometimes be. And that's not the worst behavior I've observed in others that chastens me.
I think of myself as a good listener. When my wife and I are alone, I'm much less inclined to engage in some of the poor listening or disrespectful behaviors I find obnoxious in others. But clearly I've still got some work to do. I don't relish the idea of becoming an example to others of what not to do.
The place I'm most likely to learn this lesson is when I closely observe my men friends interacting with their wives or partners. Whenever one of them interrupt their wives, finish a sentence or story, or steal a punchline, I'm reminded how rude it is, i.e. how rude I can sometimes be. And that's not the worst behavior I've observed in others that chastens me.
I think of myself as a good listener. When my wife and I are alone, I'm much less inclined to engage in some of the poor listening or disrespectful behaviors I find obnoxious in others. But clearly I've still got some work to do. I don't relish the idea of becoming an example to others of what not to do.
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