Unless plans change, it could be difficult to post tomorrow so I'll use this penultimate day of 2012 for a brief retrospective of the year past. I'd welcome hearing your "Best of 2012", using my categories or better yet, your own.
* Best time away: Bike riding in Tuscany. Actually, this might be the all time favorite for this category.
* Best time with friends: An adult sleepover! Early on a Saturday the four of us worked with Habitat For Humanity. Next: Our local coffee shop, then a matinee of "Lincoln". Played some guitar, had dinner, talked into the night. Started all over Sunday morning - breakfast, sharing the Sunday NY Times, more conversation & guitar. What a gift having such an extended interaction with other people.
* Best book club meeting: Discussing "The Tattoo Artist" by Jill Ciment.
* Best concert: Tie - The Dukes of September at NYC's Beacon Theatre and Joe Jackson at the Count Basie Theater.
* Best discovery: The Tattered Cover bookstore in Denver.
* Best family event: My niece's wedding in Alexandria, dancing so long to the great live music my green shirt turned translucent.
Happy new year!
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Friday, December 28, 2012
Tangled Up In Kudzu
This bookworm is semi-evangelical when considering which books to give as gifts. There's even a taxonomy (no laughing!) of sorts in my head:
1.) A book worth discussing with others.
2.) A book worth recommending to someone vetted as a discerning reader.
3.) A book worth buying as a gift for someone I care about.
While shopping for readers in my family this season, I realized Tom Franklin's "Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter" (2010) had in fact ascended to level three in my taxonomy. Though I finished it almost two years ago, it has remained with me. And my wife, the person I most rely on vis-a-vis steps one and two in the taxonomy, shares my passion for Franklin's tale of two men sharing a deep history.
Novels squarely facing how black and white people in the U.S. consistently miss each other are, in my experience, pretty rare. What was the last book you read that did this well? Often, I'll turn to non-fiction when looking for this kind of reading. "Crooked Letter..." not only nails this charged subject many of us avoid, it engages a receptive reader emotionally, without cheap manipulation. This novel works in a big way because it's near impossible to remain in your head while reading it - you're compelled to examine your heart.
Now about the title of this post. If you get around to reading this wonderful book, let's talk about all the kudzu, OK? That will mean you're joining me on step one of my taxonomy. I'd welcome that.
1.) A book worth discussing with others.
2.) A book worth recommending to someone vetted as a discerning reader.
3.) A book worth buying as a gift for someone I care about.
While shopping for readers in my family this season, I realized Tom Franklin's "Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter" (2010) had in fact ascended to level three in my taxonomy. Though I finished it almost two years ago, it has remained with me. And my wife, the person I most rely on vis-a-vis steps one and two in the taxonomy, shares my passion for Franklin's tale of two men sharing a deep history.
Novels squarely facing how black and white people in the U.S. consistently miss each other are, in my experience, pretty rare. What was the last book you read that did this well? Often, I'll turn to non-fiction when looking for this kind of reading. "Crooked Letter..." not only nails this charged subject many of us avoid, it engages a receptive reader emotionally, without cheap manipulation. This novel works in a big way because it's near impossible to remain in your head while reading it - you're compelled to examine your heart.
Now about the title of this post. If you get around to reading this wonderful book, let's talk about all the kudzu, OK? That will mean you're joining me on step one of my taxonomy. I'd welcome that.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
My Grade (So Far): Optimism
Optimism: A disposition or tendency to look on the more favorable side of happenings or possibilities.
How would you grade yourself so far on this most prized of attributes? Before you answer, read that definition carefully. And try to forget the hackneyed (dare I say half-assed?) "glass half full vs. glass half empty" metaphor. That's semantics and less than half the story.
"Happenings or possibilities" from this Random House definition makes grading myself for optimism very challenging. So far, I give myself a "C-" or "D+" when it comes to the former; I seem to have significant difficulty with the "silver lining" model.
On the other hand, I'm quite likely to look at the favorable side of possibilities. On that end I'd give myself a "B+" for optimism. So, split the difference and I'm in "C+" territory. The phrase "cautious optimist" fits me, at least at present.
Given today's attribute, now seems like a good time to respond to an old friend who thinks I've been too hard on myself in this series. Beginning with "ambition" on February 23, I've graded myself (and asked you to join in) on eleven attributes. My report card to date is two "A's", one "B+", four C+'s", two "C's", one "C-", one "C-/D+" split; sorry old friend, this feels about right to me. What does your report card look like? Which of the eleven attributes needs more homework?
How would you grade yourself so far on this most prized of attributes? Before you answer, read that definition carefully. And try to forget the hackneyed (dare I say half-assed?) "glass half full vs. glass half empty" metaphor. That's semantics and less than half the story.
"Happenings or possibilities" from this Random House definition makes grading myself for optimism very challenging. So far, I give myself a "C-" or "D+" when it comes to the former; I seem to have significant difficulty with the "silver lining" model.
On the other hand, I'm quite likely to look at the favorable side of possibilities. On that end I'd give myself a "B+" for optimism. So, split the difference and I'm in "C+" territory. The phrase "cautious optimist" fits me, at least at present.
Given today's attribute, now seems like a good time to respond to an old friend who thinks I've been too hard on myself in this series. Beginning with "ambition" on February 23, I've graded myself (and asked you to join in) on eleven attributes. My report card to date is two "A's", one "B+", four C+'s", two "C's", one "C-", one "C-/D+" split; sorry old friend, this feels about right to me. What does your report card look like? Which of the eleven attributes needs more homework?
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
My Solipsistic Season
solipsism: the theory that only the self exists or can be proven to exist.
First things first. Blogging is arguably the personification of a solipsistic activity. So the line I'm about to pursue could be adding insult to injury, solipsism-wise. But here goes.
When was the last time you gave yourself a Christmas gift? Maybe you did this as recently as yesterday. Or maybe it's been a while. Me? Never, that I can recall. Now before anyone goes all sanctimoniously "spirit of the season" on me, I'm not claiming to be unselfish or looking for a martyr medal.
But I promised myself (there it goes again!) when starting this blog I'd reflect on stuff average people like me sometimes have on their minds, warts and all. So... Twas the night after Christmas and I thought of me, and buying a gift to put under the tree.
First things first. Blogging is arguably the personification of a solipsistic activity. So the line I'm about to pursue could be adding insult to injury, solipsism-wise. But here goes.
When was the last time you gave yourself a Christmas gift? Maybe you did this as recently as yesterday. Or maybe it's been a while. Me? Never, that I can recall. Now before anyone goes all sanctimoniously "spirit of the season" on me, I'm not claiming to be unselfish or looking for a martyr medal.
But I promised myself (there it goes again!) when starting this blog I'd reflect on stuff average people like me sometimes have on their minds, warts and all. So... Twas the night after Christmas and I thought of me, and buying a gift to put under the tree.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
The Journey
A powerful editorial by Frank Bruni entitled "A Father's Journey" in today's NY Times has me reflecting on my own journeys.
How often do you muse about how you've arrived at your current view on any issue? Bruni's editorial about his Father's struggle with a gay son caught me a bit off guard. Discussing it with my wife, I clearly recalled a time in my life when discomfort was my usual reaction if sexual orientation came up. When did that change for me? Was my evolution gradual like Bruni's father? How much thought went into my shift? I honestly do not know.
But I do recall one conversation in the early 90's with a work colleague who had either spent more time than I with gay people or, he had educated himself more. And I'm grateful that colleague took the time to gracefully point out something ignorant I said. Call it an "aha" moment for me. Was that the beginning of my evolution toward more tolerance? Or was my colleague's gentle coaching the only thing required? Again, I do not know.
What I hope I do know is to be as kind to others on their journeys, whatever they are, as my colleague was to me.
How often do you muse about how you've arrived at your current view on any issue? Bruni's editorial about his Father's struggle with a gay son caught me a bit off guard. Discussing it with my wife, I clearly recalled a time in my life when discomfort was my usual reaction if sexual orientation came up. When did that change for me? Was my evolution gradual like Bruni's father? How much thought went into my shift? I honestly do not know.
But I do recall one conversation in the early 90's with a work colleague who had either spent more time than I with gay people or, he had educated himself more. And I'm grateful that colleague took the time to gracefully point out something ignorant I said. Call it an "aha" moment for me. Was that the beginning of my evolution toward more tolerance? Or was my colleague's gentle coaching the only thing required? Again, I do not know.
What I hope I do know is to be as kind to others on their journeys, whatever they are, as my colleague was to me.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Apres Apocalypse
The world did not end, again. So, I've decided to rub my crystal ball. How much more wrong could I be than many others who've tried this? Why not join me? Following are just three of my more snarky predictions - what are yours?
* After being released, Lindsay Lohan will be back in jail before another year passes.
* In order to sell more needless product to us narcissistic baby boomers, marketers will find at least three more "Fiftieth Anniversary Of..." non-events to celebrate in 2013.
* The 2016 presidential campaign will begin within weeks of the Oscar ceremonies.
Come on, let's not let the Mayans have all the fun, shall we?
* After being released, Lindsay Lohan will be back in jail before another year passes.
* In order to sell more needless product to us narcissistic baby boomers, marketers will find at least three more "Fiftieth Anniversary Of..." non-events to celebrate in 2013.
* The 2016 presidential campaign will begin within weeks of the Oscar ceremonies.
Come on, let's not let the Mayans have all the fun, shall we?
Friday, December 21, 2012
Givers And Takers
Imagine a continuum from one to one hundred. A one equates to someone so selfish they take but never give to others. One hundred equates to someone so selfless they give but never take from others. Where would you plot yourself on this continuum? Where would others place you?
In my last seven years working full time, one of the tools I used was a 360 degree assessment. The people in my program were asked to assess themselves on about 60 different skills, using a scale of one to five. Example of a skill to be assessed? Handling conflict. Supervisors, subordinates, colleagues and others then used that same scale to assess (anonymously) the people in my program on those same 60 skills. Part of my job was to debrief with these people a printed report showing how their own perception of each of their skills lined up with the perceptions others had of those skills. As I'm sure you'd guess, some of these conversations were difficult.
Following a recent interaction, it occurred to me how instructive it would be to have a 360 assessment on just the one issue posed in my opening paragraph. Where would family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, others place me on a taker vs. giver continuum? How aligned or mis-aligned would my view of myself be with others? And, who would be brave enough to show me my report and offer to debrief it with me?
In my last seven years working full time, one of the tools I used was a 360 degree assessment. The people in my program were asked to assess themselves on about 60 different skills, using a scale of one to five. Example of a skill to be assessed? Handling conflict. Supervisors, subordinates, colleagues and others then used that same scale to assess (anonymously) the people in my program on those same 60 skills. Part of my job was to debrief with these people a printed report showing how their own perception of each of their skills lined up with the perceptions others had of those skills. As I'm sure you'd guess, some of these conversations were difficult.
Following a recent interaction, it occurred to me how instructive it would be to have a 360 assessment on just the one issue posed in my opening paragraph. Where would family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, others place me on a taker vs. giver continuum? How aligned or mis-aligned would my view of myself be with others? And, who would be brave enough to show me my report and offer to debrief it with me?
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
That Mysterious Threshold
How many books must you love by an author before declaring that author a "favorite"?
Ludicrous question, you say? With "Homer and Langley" (2009), author EL Doctorow has reached this reading nerd's ludicrous threshold and become a favorite. Doctorow's fictionalized account of the famously eccentric Collyer brothers of early 20th century NYC managed a remarkable feat - it made me care about them. In less skilled hands their story could have evoked pity, scorn, or even disgust. Instead, using Homer as his narrator, Doctorow turns the focus from their odd behavior to their love for each other.
One reason Doctorow has become a favorite is his respect for my intelligence. I noticed the dialogue in both this book and "The March" (2005) assumed I was paying close attention; the author often doesn't say who is speaking. I've also come to appreciate his lack of showiness. At least in these last two books I've read, the writing is largely metaphor-free with the emphasis foremost on his characters, many of whom are memorably flawed. That skill was the first thing that drew me to Doctorow. The blistering and fatal pride of Coalhouse Walker in "Ragtime" is seared into my memory.
Still there wondering what my threshold is? You'll have to comment either here or otherwise or my lips remain sealed. A guy has to retain some mystery, no? A clue? OK - I've read more of Doctorow's work than is mentioned here but not ten of his books. Your turn.
Ludicrous question, you say? With "Homer and Langley" (2009), author EL Doctorow has reached this reading nerd's ludicrous threshold and become a favorite. Doctorow's fictionalized account of the famously eccentric Collyer brothers of early 20th century NYC managed a remarkable feat - it made me care about them. In less skilled hands their story could have evoked pity, scorn, or even disgust. Instead, using Homer as his narrator, Doctorow turns the focus from their odd behavior to their love for each other.
One reason Doctorow has become a favorite is his respect for my intelligence. I noticed the dialogue in both this book and "The March" (2005) assumed I was paying close attention; the author often doesn't say who is speaking. I've also come to appreciate his lack of showiness. At least in these last two books I've read, the writing is largely metaphor-free with the emphasis foremost on his characters, many of whom are memorably flawed. That skill was the first thing that drew me to Doctorow. The blistering and fatal pride of Coalhouse Walker in "Ragtime" is seared into my memory.
Still there wondering what my threshold is? You'll have to comment either here or otherwise or my lips remain sealed. A guy has to retain some mystery, no? A clue? OK - I've read more of Doctorow's work than is mentioned here but not ten of his books. Your turn.
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