(Semi-Public) Pontificating Re Public (vs. Private) Pontificators

pontificate (v): to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner.

I like to hear myself talk as much as the next person. I have noticed, however, that my patience for public pontificating is beginning to wear a little thin. I'm not talking here about our ubiquitous political pontificators, although I'm confident some of you may be getting tired of those people as well.

Instead, I'm talking about restaurant, coffee shop, movie line, book club public pontificators; you know this type. You're trying to have a nice meal or cup of coffee; maybe you're with others, maybe alone. Nearby is someone who speaks not in sentences but pronouncements. What they say is not their opinion - it's the Truth or a Fact. Does this person ask questions of the others they're with? Not on your life. The book club variety pontificator shares similar features with an added annoyance - this person is also clueless that they're monopolizing what is supposed to be a discussion. And beware extraverted English majors in the book club scenario - pontificating run amok!

As someone with a voice so loud I've been accused of shouting when I thought I was speaking sotto voce, I suspect I've annoyed a fair share of people - maybe they even thought I was pontificating (GASP!). So it's possible my increased impatience about others' public pontificating will help me restrict mine to the private variety in the future. I hope so. Because I don't ever want to be humiliated like that guy in the Woody Allen movie "Annie Hall". Remember that scene? This public pontificator is prattling on about Marshall McLuhan and Woody (Alvie Singer) is nearby getting impatient and annoyed. Then Woody magically produces McLuhan himself who tells the pontificator - "You have no idea what my theories are about". Ouch!