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Friday, August 13, 2021

Becoming A Better Man

Although I'm still some distance from fully re-establishing my equilibrium, over the last few months I've begun to better understand how I coped when my life turned upside-down starting late last year. It comes down to a simple fact: Having the partner in life I have helps me be the best man I'm capable of being.  

As tumultuous as my life was for several months, it was much easier for me to unselfishly do what I did because my wife fully supported the hard choices to be made, choices requiring sacrifice for each of us and for our marriage. But having watched her example for forty-three years - doing the right thing more often than not, being kind above all else, usually thinking of others before thinking of herself  - helped make those choices much less difficult. The closer I followed her model, the more I liked who I was becoming, despite the significant stress of our living situation.  

I've had enough exposure to toxic people to last a lifetime. Having a toxic partner during the recent turmoil in my life might have de-railed me. Worse, if the person by my side begrudged the help they gave to me, damage could have been done to the circumstances I was trying to ameliorate. I'm grateful beyond measure to report that instead, I emerged from the tumult a stronger, more worthy person. And that occurred largely because of my partner in life.       

8 comments:

  1. Wow what a nice tribute to Kim!!!!

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  2. Pat,[]what an amazing tribute for Kim and such a humility for you to offer it in this public setting. Hats Off my friend.
    rjm

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    1. RJM; Thanks for reading and for your gracious comment.

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  3. I can only add my own modest praise for your tribute to Kim having known both of you for many years. It is a great blessing to have a spouse to whom one owes a great debt of gratitude for all those moments when life pivots towards darkness and she is there to help with way forward. And of course let's not forget her ability to laugh at our absurdities in the good times. My wife Karen is that person for me for as many years as you and Kim have been together. We are both lucky in love.

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    1. Thanks Steve; we are indeed lucky in love. BTW, I love your phrase "..when life pivots toward darkness.."; nice.

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  4. Hello Pat. We've only had the pleasure of meeting your wonderful wife once but it was a great day spent with lively conversation in a very nice setting and we enjoyed ourselves so much. It is easy to see how you can write such a great post about how supportive Kim is. I have come to refer to my wife as the 'lovely Rose', both in reference to the beautiful flower and also in reference to how she cares for and about not only me but so many others.
    Heres to the supportive, and lovely, partners incur lives.
    Be well,
    Bob

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    1. Bob; Thanks for your comment. As Steve said - directly above - we are each fortunate to have partners like we have.

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