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Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Talking To Children (& Ourselves)

Recall the last time you were in a public place and a child you didn't know enchanted you in some way. A cute hat, a guileless question you overheard, an earnest request for some treat. What happened next? Did you speak to that child? How well do you recall the conversation you had with yourself either before you spoke or after you decided to remain silent?

I don't like to let these opportunities pass me by, so I can hear how my conversations with myself often begin: How will this child react to me? Then, more significantly: How will the adult accompanying this child react to me? Sound familiar? After I observe both of them briefly - but always the adult a little longer than the child - if my gut still says "go", I barge ahead. When I get a response from the child, I almost always leave the encounter beaming. How can anyone not enjoy an interaction with a child, however brief?

The times I'm met with silence? I desist immediately. Children are wisely taught to be cautious around strangers and some of them may not be fully capable of making a distinction between an innocently friendly person like me and someone with less benign intent, even when a responsible adult is by their side. And under those circumstances, i.e. when no encounter occurs, the conversation with myself frequently deepens as I walk away. I wonder: How do we all help our children learn appropriate caution while ensuring they also know the world is mostly made up of decent people? 

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