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Friday, August 5, 2011

When Objectivity Is Difficult

How many parents have you met who think their children aren't smart, talented, good looking, etc.? Is it possible to be objective about our children and their attributes? Maybe a better question would be, is it smart to be objective about this?

My daughter is now 22 years old, an aspiring actress living in New York City. As she was growing up I read every book I could get my hands on about building a child's self image and then tried many of the suggestions. My daughter strikes most people she meets as confident yet I've never heard anyone allude to her being boastful or full of herself. Of course, it's probably unlikely someone would say something like that to or around me. It's possible that's another reason objectivity about our children is difficult. Who in their right mind is going to openly criticize our kids? I recall having a very tense interaction with a Kindergarten teacher when she hinted at a shortcoming in my daughter. I mean, really! My daughter? No way!

Because of the occupation she has chosen, my daughter has already faced numerous rejections; each one stings me. So when she called today and let me know of her latest triumph I began reflecting on my objectivity. I decided when it comes to her, I'm glad I threw away that notion 22 years ago.   

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