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Friday, March 4, 2016

Mr. Id From 20,000 Feet

Mr. Id is conducting interviews for the cliche police. Job requirements:

* Must be an avid reader. Interview will include an obnoxiously snobbish literary litmus test to ensure candidate reading tastes meet wholly arbitrary and totally elitist standards. Suggested pre-interview reading - "The War Against Cliche"  (2001) - Martin Amis. 

* Willingness to overlook first amendment when egregious cliches are identified in speech or print. Initial area of focus: Celebrities, deejays & political pundits, closely followed by bloggers with cowardly alter-egos.

* Proven track record recognizing the subtle creep of cliche, including, but not limited to, overcooked adjectives (viz: had first requirement above used the hoary VORACIOUS instead of the infinitely more apt "avid"), over-use of adverbs (viz #2: all of requirement #1 & the previous phrase), any propensity for esoteric (egregious) or pretentiously Latin (viz) words.  

Ready for your first arrest? FYIMr, Id has previous experience with handcuffs as a fashion accessory. And time away could be good - maybe he'll learn again the value of simple words and keeping his writing fresh.                    

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