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Thursday, December 22, 2016

To Pursue Or Not To Pursue

What percentage of your relationships with others - family, friends, etc. are largely reciprocal? If you're at all like me, you're pursued about as often as you pursue.

That said, each holiday season I seem to reflect a fair amount on those relationships in which I'm much more frequently the pursuer. How many of these relationships do you have? If you have none - or none come readily to mind - here's the next question: How frequently are you avidly pursued? I suspect anyone who cannot readily identify any relationships where pursuer is more frequently their role is likely more frequently pursued. Simple math, no?

Once I'm down this rabbit hole, my yearly reflections toggle from logical to cynical to insecure. Logical = The person I'm pursuing - more than being pursued by - has been very busy, had personal difficulties, lost my contact info (a stretch, given technology). Cynical = My pursued person is chronically disorganized or has lost my contact info and eschewed technology. Insecure = You can figure this one out yourself.

The good news for me in 2016 was that one important relationship where I had long been the unrequited pursuer got back on equal footing. I love happy endings.  

1 comment:

  1. This is such a good post, Pat! We all need to think about nurturing healthy relationships. There's no reason for insecurity.You're a smart man. Your readers and friends are lucky to have you. You have been such a help to many. You give good advice that we can all use in our daily living. Good job!