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Sunday, December 2, 2012

One Key Thing

Someone recently asked me the "key" to the enduring partnership my wife and I have. I'm a little ambivalent about the question. On one hand, it's flattering to be perceived as half of a successful relationship. On the other, it feels a bit like being asked to write one's obituary, or being called a "living legend"; there's an air of finality in the question. And asking for a key to the mystery of any human interaction strikes me as simplistic; there are too many doors, each with a different lock.

But thin skinned reactions and clumsy metaphors aside, the question triggered two reflections in me:
1.) It assisted me in understanding comments several people have made about my blog, i.e. it can be intimidating to respond to penetrating and/or provocative questions.
2.) It helped me to focus on one thing, even if it's not the thing, that has sustained our partnership.

The first one that came to me? Trust. Yet as critical as trust is, our ability to surprise one another is an element neither of us could do without. How about one thing, if not the thing, that has led to your successful partnership?   


  1. Distance, not speaking the same language, and Bartok's 4th string quartet.

  2. In addition to trust and surprise, I add a quote from you, "I'm interested." And I think that's what keeps our relationship interesting...we're both interested. Not just in our relationship, although that's important, but in life. We are never bored. You piss me off a lot...but I'm never, never bored. (I want to insert a smiley face here, but will refrain).

  3. Laughter and Spontaneity (I can't spell that word!) And communication. I can't pin down just one thing.