RSVP

I was recently reminded of that great scene from Mark Twain's "Adventures Of Tom Sawyer" where Tom gets to listen to others eulogize him when he is mistakenly presumed to be dead. That got me ghoulishly reflecting. What do I want to happen at my funeral service? How about you? Come on, don't leave me out here on this one all alone. Treat it as a morbid planning exercise.

* I want all the food to be high calorie, high fat, high cholesterol, i.e. the best tasting stuff. As Julia Child once said "You can never go wrong adding butter."

* I want live music, the more uptempo the better - nothing mellow or somber. Lots of dancing, lots of laughter, lots of volume.

* I want people to read passages from their favorite books, poems, short stories, essays, plays. Copies of all readings should be provided (author name and full title of piece, please) so others can later look up the source material if they choose.

Surely I'm not the only one who ever gave this some thought? And though I plan to stick around quite a while, knowing this agenda, aren't you dying to attend? Sorry, date is unavailable at present but feel free to RSVP anyway.