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Thursday, June 27, 2013

My Grade (So Far): Amiability

amiability: the state of having a friendly or willing disposition. 

Of the 17 attributes covered in this series to date, this is among the most difficult for me to nail down and settle on a grade. So far anyway, my amiability has often been driven by my moods. And managing my moods is a perpetual struggle. How familiar is my struggle to you?

Because I've rarely had difficulty being amiable with children, a new technique I've been experimenting with is to occasionally pretend people I'm interacting with are eight years old. Not by acting condescendingly or trying to dumb down conversation, just approaching some interactions with adults using the open posture I bring to children. The technique has given me a boost in amiability and also helped rein in the judgaholic a bit.

Still, those moods of mine get the better of me. Watching me interact with someone recently, my usually amiable wife said "What was up with you back there?" Replaying the scene she was referring to in my head, I realized I'd forgotten to use my new technique. The result? Another "F" for amiability that day. With that lapse fresh on my mind and my new technique still a long way from being ingrained, guess today I'll have to go with a "C" for amiability, at least so far. How about you?

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